I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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