I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

Canvas not available.

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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.
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Why do some people have an instant aversion to banjo players?

It saves time in the long run.

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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