I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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