I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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