If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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