I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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