I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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How do you know when its Michael Jacksons bed time ?

When the big hand touches the little hand
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What day of the week tastes the best?

Sunday!
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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