In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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I went down the local supermarket, I said, "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",

he said, "Those are pickled onions".

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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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