Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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