Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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