"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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