Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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Why did the tree go to the dentist?

It needed a root canal.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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