Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've got you covered!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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