So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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