Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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