Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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