That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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