The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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