The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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