The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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