There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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