There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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