There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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