Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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