Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.

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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.

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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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How many gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.

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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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