Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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