What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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How do you know when its Michael Jacksons bed time ?

When the big hand touches the little hand
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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