What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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