What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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