What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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