What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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