What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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