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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?
Got two fives for a ten?
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!
If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?
A phew.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?
It needed to be trimmed.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?
He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?
No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?
Polar Bond.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?
Gator-Ade.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?
Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.
It’s a little fishy.
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