What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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