What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.

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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.

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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos

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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.

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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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