What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What do you call the king of vegetables?

Elvis Parsley.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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