What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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