What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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