What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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