What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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