What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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