What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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