What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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