What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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