What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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