What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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