What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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