What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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