What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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My pastor, he ate too many beans.

He had in his own pews.
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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