What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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How do you make an egg laugh?

Tell it a yolk.

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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.

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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.

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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish

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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story

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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.

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