What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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