What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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