What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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