What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.
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