What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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