What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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