What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog

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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper

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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!

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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.

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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.


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