What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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