What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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