What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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