What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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What kind of driver has no arms or legs?

A screwdriver.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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