What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.


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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.

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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.

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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.

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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.

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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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