What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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