What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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