What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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